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By Mason Duchatschek Your troubled teen is running with the wrong crowd and has become alarmingly defiant and rebellious again. The messy hair, dingy clothing, and body piercings continue to be the norm. Since your teen has experimented with drugs and alcohol in the past, youre certain that he or she is back to the same old tricks, even though he or she swears things are different now. Some parents assume their kids are continuing to abuse drugs or alcohol and end up treating them as if theyve done something wrong while those assumptions couldnt be further from the truth. Those wrong assumptions end up fueling resentment instead of giving kids the means to prove their trustworthiness. Your teen wants your trust and you want to give it. Unfortunately, neither of you knows how to give what the other wants. When it comes to substance abuse, theres a relatively new way to separate fact from fiction, and its becoming more popular than most people think. One of the reasons you may not have heard of it is because of its private and confidential nature. It provides the foundation for reestablishing trust based on truth. If a child wants to prove that he or she is drug free and a parent needs solid evidence rather than verbal assurances, then a home drug testing program may be the answer. Critics of this emerging trend of home drug testing claim that the act of testing teens for drugs is an irresponsible abuse of trust and only drives a wedge between parents and their teenage children, who already have a strained relationship. However, who can argue against relationships based on facts over fiction, especially when the bond of trust has already been destroyed? Mason Duchatschek has interviewed thousands of parents, teenagers, school board members, counselors, school principals, and superintendents. He is the president of www.TestMyTeen.com (mason@testmyteen.com) based in Fenton, Missouri. Article Source: http://EzineArticles.com/?expert=Mason_Duchatschek http://EzineArticles.com/?Parents-And-Teens—Reclaiming-Trust-And-Repairing-Damaged-Relationships&id=479272 working capital loans for short periods sainsburys personal loan same day second paycheck advance online home equity loans

By Tony Jacowski Career planning while you are still in college has many advantages. Ideally, you should start your career planning by choosing the right kind major suitable for the career that you have chosen. So, we start this discussion by identifying the job that is best for you. Identifying The Job That Suits You This first step calls for organized thinking on your part. Basically, at this stage, you will be full of ideas and have a wide range of fields to choose from, making your choice more difficult. Here are some crucial steps you must take to identify your ideal career: 1. Most people make the mistake of thinking about all of their options at the same time. As a consequence, all of them appear attractive. But you should consider whether you possess the right attitude and what subjects you were best in when you are in college. 2. Evaluate each option one at a time, discarding those that may not be financially or personally rewarding. Have clarity of thought by assigning the most weight to those that match your attitude and flair. 3. Give serious thought to how you want to spend the rest of your life. For example, a teachers job entails the least physical work and lots of vacation time, while a traveling salesmans job requires you to travel for long stretches at a time. 4. Consult campus career counselors who will help you identify and improve your aptitude in your weak areas. 5. Setting priorities in life is important. You may find that your parents are your best resource in this area. Acquiring And Honing Your Skills Your next step is to arm yourself with appropriate skill sets: 1. Choose a major which will best prepare you for the career that you have chosen. For example, a career as an accountant calls for formal education in those subjects. You may want to start with accounting subjects for careers such as Financial Controller or CPA. 2. Subscribe to industry journals to keep abreast with current events in your field. Many associations have student chapters and enrolling in these gives you many opportunities to interact with industry leaders. 3. Submit an article to industry journals or participate in seminars. Take a part time job that will add to your experience. 4. Studying hard and getting top grades are a must. Getting Ready For The Final Step It is when you are in your final year or semester in college that you begin the real quest for a job. Now is the time that you will find out where you really stand in the job market. 1. Gather job advertisements in your focus area; separate the must-have and preferable skills within them. This shows whether you are lacking skills, and if yes, in what areas. 2. Only a good resume gets interviews. An HR professional, student counselor and Internet resources can help you develop one. Nevertheless, creating a good resume is about successfully presenting and highlighting your skills, abilities and experience. 3. Attending interviews is another major test. Learn interview etiquette, be crystal clear in your thoughts and speech and if at all possible attend mock interviews conducted by your college career office. Tony Jacowski is a quality analyst for The MBA Journal. Aveta Solutions Six Sigma Online (http://www.sixsigmaonline.org) offers online six sigma training and certification classes for lean six sigma, black belts, green belts, and yellow belts. Article Source: http://EzineArticles.com/?expert=Tony_Jacowski http://EzineArticles.com/?A-College-Career-Planning-Guide&id=223611 unsecured loan bad credit uk hialeah car loan for people with bad credit bad credit cash loan no credit check motorcycle

By Nicola Kennedy With Grandparents Day being the first real holiday of the school year (falling on the first Sunday after Labor Day), crafts are typically a special way for children to celebrate the holiday. Different craft ideas that are used on other holidays can also be adapted for Grandparents Day. Here are a few ideas for your children to take part in for this holiday. One of the easiest crafts to create is a greeting card. A child can draw his or her own picture and use personal creativity to make a card that speaks from the heart. A card created by hand will please any grandparent more than a store-bought card ever could because whatever the card shows or says is guaranteed to come from the heart. Many online resources offer black and white posters that can be printed out for coloring. These can be colored and given to grandparents as a gift for the holiday. If you start early, you can help your child create a collage with pictures and magazine cutouts that show the childs feelings for his or her grandparents. Or, you can help your child pick flowers and dry them, then glue them to a piece of construction paper on which he or she can express their love for grandparents. Crafts can be simple or complex. A favorite project for children is to use uncooked, dry macaroni glued to paper to create a picture or phrase. Candy necklaces are also popular. Even beads are available for children to make jewelry with now. The important thing when choosing a craft for your child for Grandparents Day is that it be appropriate for their age and abilities. It should be simple enough that they dont feel as though they are being forced to do something they dont really want to do, while maintaining a challenge or difficulty level that keeps their interest and doesnt make them feel as though they are wasting their time. Crafts are a great way to say I Love You to the special grandparents in your childs life, and the grandparents will certainly appreciate the consideration shown by their grandchildren. Nicola always enjoys celebrating Grandparents Day. Visit her Grandparents Day 2006 site for Grandparents Day craft ideas, tips and news, information and views at http://Grandparents-Day.your-holiday.info This article may be reprinted in full so long as the resource box and the live links are included intact. All rights reserved. Copyright Your-Holiday.info Article Source: http://EzineArticles.com/?expert=Nicola_Kennedy http://EzineArticles.com/?Craft-Ideas-For-Grandparents-Day&id=246612 payday loans with no fax in canada quick loan payday loans in las vegas nevada online personal loans

By Michelle Bery In a day and age of increased awareness of living healthy, attention has naturally turned to the use of whole foods as part of a healthy lifestyle. More and more people are reducing the use of processed foods and instead focusing on natural foods in their whole form. As part of this process, it seems inevitable that those in search of a healthier lifestyle turn their attention to using herbs for health. Its no secret that herbs have been used for centuries to enhance food, increase and sustain health, and remedy a host of ailments. Since prehistoric times herbs for health have been part of the human experience. And as more and more herbs were discovered to have healing principles, herbs for health were soon organized into a classification system that allowed people to take full advantage of their properties in food and medicine. Some herbs for health that are used today include ginger root for help combating nausea, blackberry root in treating diarrhea, sore throat, and cough, ginseng to increase metabolism, and even dandelion to treat eczema. Many a culture including the Native Americans and Chinese have made a study of the way in which herbs can be used to increase overall vitality and treat minor ailments as well as disease. Additionally, the use of herbs for health extends to their use in all types of cuisine. Natural herbs enhance flavor and do so without the use of added fats, preservatives, and salt. For those looking to focus their diet on natural foods, the use of natural herbs in their diet will go a long way to enhancing their lifestyle. Using herbs for health can be as convenient and as simple as you make it. An array of natural herbs can be found as close as your local grocery store; as well as in farmers markets and health foods stores. But for those who want herbs at their fingertips for a variety of uses, it may be beneficial to plant your own herb garden. Either way, a little bit of research will yield an enormous amount of information about the uses of herbs for health. With some planning and simple integration of herbs into your everyday routine, you may be surprised with how your overall health and vitality begins to improve. For easy to understand, in depth information about herbs visit our ezGuide 2 Herbs. Article Source: http://EzineArticles.com/?expert=Michelle_Bery http://EzineArticles.com/?Using-Herbs-For-Health&id=459196 no fax pay loans sudbury payday loans ontarion rental homes lithonia ga no credit check need cash fast

By Ramil Idrisov Marrying a foreigner became usual thing in Russia and in the West since the Internet was invented. I have even read in one forum disapproving notes of an American woman towards American men for this tendency. In her disapprove she criticizes both sides – Russian women for their wish to leave this “awful country of Russia” at any cost and even at the cost of getting married to an old and bald man, and for the men the blame was that some of them being old and bald desperately wish to have young sexy Russian brides believing that these women will love them just for bringing them over there. I think she is right disapproving men. For one thing I could not have held myself from asking the question – “has she ever been to Russia”. I did not receive the answer for that question. Why do you think there are so many cases of scam? Numerous cases of scam show that many Russian women feel quite comfortable at home and try to use “Russian brides” sites for money interest. The position of the society in both parts of the world, Russia and the West, is usually negative. Western people who have in some or other way dealt with Russian women and “Russian dating” generated a lot of opinions. Many of them are just myths or far away from reality. As a citizen of one of the ex soviet republics I have right to correct or oppose them. I will do it later. Now I want to tell a little bit about Russia. Russia today is not that rich as some western developed countries because there are economical and political difficulties in many regions. But Russia is improving and getting richer incredibly fast and in many regions and big cities situation is quite well. I don’t know why, but many western mass media try to show situation of things about Russia worse then in reality. So why there are so many the online services with thousands of beautiful Russian women targeted at western auditory? In my opinion the answer is very simple – it is just a dream selling business. On the first most visited pages of the “Russian dating” sites you can see selected beautiful faces. This dream selling business is for both participants – for western men and for Russian women. Many people were disillusioned because the differences in cultures and life stiles are quite big. Some naive Russian girls believe that they will get into colorful life as in Hollywood movies but not in everyday routine. And I think this business exist not only because many Russian women want to settle in the USA or other rich countries but because western men need it and are desperate to find qualities they think western women lack. However, there are many cases of happy examples of marriage. Actually, it is not bad if a man wants to find a Russian woman for relationships. He can find a perfect life partner. But it could be mistake to believe in some myths about Russian women and for women to believe in myth about life in America. That is why a man deciding to sign up in some or other online “Russian dating” sites should search not a Russian woman but just a good woman; after all she could be Russian. But I believe you can build good relationships with Russian woman if you like and understand Russia, accept all plusses and minuses of Russia, if you can understand a little bit of Russian language, Russian culture, and make some efforts to study Russian language. You will lose if you consider like “I will take away from that “awful country of Russia” a woman and she should be thankful to me for the rest of her life”. I know one example of very happy marriage between a Dutchman and an Ukraine woman. He came to Kiev, very beautiful city and capital of Ukraine, in order to be with her. He could have allowed this move because he has business on the Internet and for him the place of living does not matter. One of the mistakes when western men search for ”Russian brides” is that they search in sites created just for this purpose because “Russian brides” sites are usually limited by 3 countries: Russia, Ukraine, and Byelorussia. The previous USSR included 15 republics, like Kazakhstan, Uzbekistan, Kyrgyzstan, Azerbaijan, Armenia, Lithuania, Latvia, Estonia…There is a lot of Russian women and can be less cases of scam because Russian women in those countries would leave these republics more willingly to find a foreigner husband. The reason is simple. For this search will do usual dating sites with big databases. Just try to browse personal ads of the members from any ex soviet republics in greatfriendfinder.com. In Russia the business “find a husband abroad” or “find a Russian bride online” was born when the situation was far away from stability and many women wanted to find better and stable life abroad. Many “Russian brides” sites made a lot of money then. Webmasters seeing that financial success are developing these kinds of sites and agencies in big quantities and now. But today this business turns to be tricky because a competition is fierce. Touching previous soviet republics I can say that Russian women there will respond you more willingly if you email them. Before you make your own conclusions about Russian women or if you want to get some experience how to communicate with Russian women, to know more about Russian women or to find a Russian girlfriend the source http://www.chatplusflirt.com can be interesting for you. It is the popular Russian dating portal. It is on Russian language because created for Russian speaking people around the world. But it is extremely easy to use, most simplified, and absolutely free to send and receive messages if you find someone attractive interesting and want to contact. I would not recommend you to search there for serious relationships. There you can find a lot of pen pals of women from Russia, from all ex soviet republics, and IN YOUR AREA DIRECTLY. There are many wherever you live – America, Europe, Australia. Though many members of this site can understand English language, especially if you contact Russian women living in your country, the site can be useful for you if you want to pick up a little bit of Russian language. Article Source: http://EzineArticles.com/?expert=Ramil_Idrisov http://EzineArticles.com/?Article-About-Russian-Dating,-Russian-Women,-And-Why-There-Are-So-Many-Russian-Brides-Sites&id=348668 us fast cash cash america cash advance guarenteed personal loans motorcycle loan with bad credit

By [http://ezinearticles.com/?expert=Michael_Hanna]Michael Hanna With the mobile phone marketplace increasingly competitive and the major phone manufacturers needing to diversify and update continually, we look at Sony Ericsson’s use of the Walkman brand to keep at the head of the pack. Coke, Nike, McDonalds, Starbucks and the Sony Walkman perhaps these brands have the status as the most recognisable and iconic brands of the last century. To attain such a prestige position in the social consciousness is a marketers dream and one that should be capitalised on. Take the Sony Walkman, a brand that emerged first in the late 1970′s and attained an unparalleled position as the most recognised consumer or electronic good throughout the 80′s and 90′s. Even with the emergence of MP3 technology and the shift of music from cassettes and CD’s to files, the Walkman brand still pervades in the mind of those of us old enough to remember the mid 1980′s. Little wonder, then than Sony are reincarnating the Walkman in as many formats as possible to try and capitalise on the brand awareness that the Walkman still manages to conjure up. Nowhere is this more apparent than in the recent ranges of mobile phones from Sony Ericsson. The Walkman branding came back in a big way at the beginning of 2006 with the release of a range of Walkman branded [http://www.dialaphone.co.uk/sonyericssonphones.html ]Sony Ericsson Phones. Recognising the movement towards MP3 technology within the mobile phone market, Sony wasted no time in reeling out the old star brand and stamping it over its’ range of phones to herald in the new era of music player capability within mobile handsets. The Walkman range of phones (or W range) is squarely aimed at music lovers and most of the handsets include a 512 MB memory card to support the handsets MP3 capabilities. The existing range of phones are best sellers and needless to say that an update range of Walkman branded phones is in the [http://www.sonyericsson.com/spg.jsp?cc=gb&lc=en&ver=4000&template=ph1&zone=ph ]Sony Ericsson pipeline. Second time around and in a different marketplace and in a completely different landscape as far as music consumption and storage is concerned, the Walkman is a star again. The mobile phone industry is a perfect fit for Walkman and Sony recognises this. The nature of the Walkman, portable, fashionable, ubiquitous the only regret for Sony might be that MP3 technology did not emerge 5 years before it eventually did. If that were the case, the Sony Ericsson might be looking at an even larger slice of the handset manufacturer than it does now. About the Author: Michael Hanna is a keen writer, and internet marketer living in Scotland: Contact details: E-mail: [mailto:samqam@googlemail.com]samqam@googlemail.com Phone: 0131 561 2251 Michael’s Website: [http://www.gransha-taxi.co.uk/Belfast-airport-taxis.htm]Belfast Taxi Article Source: http://EzineArticles.com/?expert=Michael_Hanna http://EzineArticles.com/?Sony-Ericsson-Phones-to-Build-on-the-Popularity-of-Walkman-brand&id=281637 opt out credit reporting credit card thehawkeye police report unauthorized use of delaware free credit report bad credit-personal loan

By [http://ezinearticles.com/?expert=Kingston_Amadan]Kingston Amadan There are some phone taps that are not true taps at all. They are more like bugs that only allow you to listen to one end of the conversation. While one end can be very useful, the fact is that it can also be very incomplete, leaving a lot of things to conjecture. The most effective phone taps allow you to listen to both ends of the conversation so that you can get as much context from the conversation as possible. Usually hard taps, soft taps, and advanced cell phone bugs are the phone taps that can allow you to listen to both sides of the conversation. These are taps that get you into the system, so to speak, so that you are in the middle of the communication. The best and most advanced taps are not noticeable by the parties being listened to, and so the eavesdropper can hear whatever needs to be heard without letting the others know she or he is there. Hard phone taps are those that make use of an actual physical line. They consist of a secondary line hooked into the primary line and then bridged to another location. The person listening can be at the location of the tap, or they can use a slave to send a transmission. This type of phone tap is extremely difficult to detect, as it is hardwired and usually at a location away from the phone, so sweeping the room for bugs will not be effective. Soft phone taps are those that take place inside the software of the phone company. The listener gains access to the digital network by hacking in or receiving permission. Most phone companies today now incorporate digital lines into their service, even if the person has a land line. This means that the listener only needs to know which line is associated with the conversation he or she would like to listen to. These are relatively easy to find if someone knows how to look in the software, but virtually undetectable to the parties having the conversations. Cell phone taps are another matter altogether. They make use of a special cell phone that allows you to dial a secret number to activate the phone for listening. The user is usually unsuspecting and has no idea you are listening to the conversation when you use cell phone taps. (c) 2005 Copyright [http://www.spyassociates.com ]www.spyassociates.com. This article is about: Phone Taps. About The Author Kingston Amadan To learn more about Spy and Surveillance Products visit [http://www.spyassociates.com ]http://www.spyassociates.com. Read other related articles at [http://spyassociates.blogspot.com/ ]http://spyassociates.blogspot.com/. Article Source: http://EzineArticles.com/?expert=Kingston_Amadan http://EzineArticles.com/?Phone-Taps-That-Allow-You-to-Listen-to-Both-Ends-of-the-Conversation&id=232779 bad credit unsecured small business loans auto loan for bad credit people home mortgage bad credit and little money down the bad and ugly of the creditors of the loan recovery by the banks in india

By Butch Hamilton The phrase that rings across the internet hourly by people who have joined online programs that don’t work. The fact that most online programs are designed to promote unrealistic expectations for unwary newbie marketers is a hurdle that real home based business professional programs must contend with. The very thought of an internet based business often tells people that it is nothing more than a lie and they would never become involved with such risky venture. The element of risk is present in any online or offline business venture. How many offline businesses are never successful? The true answer is the same for both. So what is the core reason behind having no success in a home based business. I am going to delve deeply into that issue in this article to bring light facts and clarity to the process of marketing effectively online. The way people often find an online opportunity is from an email blast, classified ad or through simply surfing through categories like home based business, begin a home based business and others. Most people surfing the net are drawn into flashy and appealing websites. These websites are called splash pages. There are people dedicated to building the most attractive and appealing splash page that will capture the interest of the incessant surfer. These people are paid large amounts of money just for their ability to build some nonsensical, yet appealing, webpage. The purpose of the splash page is to get people to fill in a contact form for more information. If the person falls for that, then the process of internet marketing begins. The email has been harvested and the autoresponder messages, or the call to action letters, will be sent in a systematic and calculated way. The process can then be followed up by phone calls to the unwary newbie. These calls have been paid for by the surfer because the email is the sign they these people are interested in building a home based business. This is virgin territory for the professional marketer and he will go to great links to convince, coerce and sell his product or service. The harvesting of emails for the purpose of making money has been the talk of many an article online. This one area tends to completely turn people off as once those emails start as they are then sold time and time again to other network marketing companies. The unwary surfer has put into place the system that unscrupulous marketers us e to peddle their wares. This process leads to frustration for the person who is earnestly seeking a home based business that is both lucrative and does not require wrong tactics to get started. There are real and legitimate home based businesses that are owned by people who have dedicated their lives in the honest pursuit of home based business entrepreneurship. They never use email blasts, splash pages, phone calls to people they don’t know and only use time tested techniques like search engine optimization to get websites into highly surfed areas on the internet. These companies stand for integrity and honest business dealings and go the extra mile to turn the phrase “I can’t make money online,” into “I am making incredible money with a real home based business.” This real business offer is most appealing to honest and forthright people who are searching for a solid business to invest their time and money in. These companies are dedicated to providing state of the art and sophisticated websites that are not full of hype and lies. They provide people the tools and training that will empower them with success. These companies are the ones that are making real time money for real people on a consistent basis. There is a zero tolerance for unrealistic and imaginary claims of success. The days of the so-called internet gurus is quickly and mercifully coming to an end because of these types of professional internet online businesses. I, for one, say kudos to Al Turnquist for providing real people just like myself the opportunity to be involved in a sophisticated and professional home based business venture that is assisting people in showing them the honest way to approach the internet. Al works non-stop to weed out the wrong thinking so often seen in the internet business world. and bring into existence the right way to approach a professional home based business. bad credit mortgage approval used car loan bad credit raise credit score fast apartments carrollton texas poor credit pets

By Trevor Kugler Many people find cleaning a trout to be a daunting task, seeing as how a trout’s scales aren’t as pronounced as many fishes scales are. A fish such as a Bass, for example is a bit easier to clean, seeing as how its scales and skin are thicker, but a trout really isn’t that much harder to learn how to clean and get ready for the table. In reality, it’s as easy as 1-2-3. I’m going to assume you have a filet knife is hand or within reach, when these steps take place. 1) The first thing to do is make sure the trout is dead. Now turn it so that the fishes back is in the palm of your hand. Make sure you have a good grip on this fish, so it doesn’t slip and cause you to cut yourself. A wet trout can be slicker than a freshly greased snake! 2) Locate the anus towards the tail end if the fish (for the uninitiated this is a small round hole). While holding the dead trout tight, insert the knife into the anus about a 14 of an inch. Now simply slice down the length of the fish, just cutting through the skin. What you’re basically doing is gutting the fish. Once the slice is made down the length of the fish, simply remove and discard the innards. 3) Now, holding the trout in the same position (on its back, in the palm of your hand) you’ll notice a nein that extends along the entire length of the fish. Using your thumb, this must be removed. Use the nail of your thumb as a sort of shovel and scrape this red vein out. When you have it loosened up, simply shake the carcass in the water to remove anything that may be left over. At this point, insert your knife into the gill area and make a cut. Now using your fingers, remove the gills. Rinse the entire carcass. What you have now is a cleaned trout. It’s as simple as that. After a bit of practice, this entire process takes minutes. Some people leave the heads on and some people remove the head of the trout, the choice is yours. The bottom line is that you now know how to clean a trout. At the end of the day it really is as easy as 1-2-3. Trevor Kugler is co-founder of JRWfishing.com and an avid angler. He has more than 20 years experience fishing for all types of fish, and 15 years of business and internet experience. He currently raises his three year old daughter in the heart of trout fishing country..Montana! Don’t Forget The Pictures! Catch More Fish With JRW!!. Article Source: http://EzineArticles.com/?expert=Trevor_Kugler http://EzineArticles.com/?Cleaning-Trout—As-Easy-As-1-2-3&id=513789 phentermine diet pills on line phentermine diet pills where to buy herbal phentermine buy phentermine online prescription

By Scot McKay If you have put any effort at all into online dating, I’m sure that you’ve read plenty about how to write online profiles, and how NOT to write them. Knowing the basics about that is a good thing, of course, and I’ve written my fair share on the subject. The truth is that there is a wealth of information our there and help is readily available when it comes to creating terrific, effective online profiles. Yet, you can somehow always count on finding plenty of particularly entertaining material like what follows when browsing profile narratives. All of these are lifted from actual profiles. Enjoy! “I’m a walking, talking dichotomy. I hope you’re the same.” After all, opposites attract, right? “I need a man who can full feel my fantasies.” I distinctly remember an email I wrote to this one entitled, “Feeling Full”. I don’t remember a response. Haha. “The three things I want most in a man are honesty, sincerity and truthfulness.” Great. The three things I want most in a woman are repetition, redundancy and duplication. “I am recently divorced, so I am now at a stage in my life where I am not looking for one night stands.” Well, thank goodness both the marriage and that sort of behavior have come to an end. I wonder if that’s a coincidence? “I don’t drink beer, but I’ll play darts at the bar with a screwdriver” Be sure to use a Philips. Those pointy ones seem to stick to the dartboard better. “I’ll bend over backwards to help anyone who needs it, but I refuse to be a pushover.” OK, so she doesn’t need any help bending over backwards, get it? “Attractive, fun, professional woman looking to date the same.” Hmm. Can’t help you there, girlie. I’m a guy. “I AM A HAPPY AND HONEST PERSON I HATE LAYS AND TO BE UNLOYAL” Well, that about covers everything. “I have my B.S. and J.D. I mostly use the B.S. part to do my J.D. job.” Anyone who is divorced can appreciate that one. Thanks for being honest. “A man who does not mind the simple and loving jesters I may send his way.” Nah, I’m good. I’m pretty well stocked up on freaks with funky suits and bells on their hats. “I hate complainers.” Why? We LOVE you. “I am an independent woman and don’t need a man to support me, although the ability to do so would be nice.” At least the truth came out early. LOL “I’m looking for someone with as many things in common as me.” And I thought Yogi Berra was married. The more times I read this, the more I laughed. “If you are looking for a true blue type I may be your match.” This woman’s first pic was of her posing with a Blue Man Group guy in Vegas-so I guess she wasn’t kidding. “I’m a hot box, so this cuddle thing all night is out of the question unless it’s the dead middle of winter.” I’m willing to bet that this woman had NO IDEA why she was getting the kind of responses she must have received. “DON’T REPLY BACK IF YOU HAVE PROBLEM WITH DRUGS, ALCOHOL OR IF YOU ARE A FREAK.” OK, I ask you, have you ever met a self-proclaimed freak? “I used to be a great liar… I can smell one a mile away.” Well it’s good to know that though you used to be a great liar, the skill set it still finely tuned…just in case. “Im etremly drawn to someone w/ a high level of intelegents.” It’s just painful to read this. (See also: “I’m looking for an intelligant man”) “By the way guys….there are NOT two ‘ll’s in ‘traveling’!” OK, rule number one: If you are going to obnoxiously correct people who you haven’t even met yet, at least have your facts together. See www.dictionary.com for elaboration. “I love the roll of being a mom.” How about a little roll playing? “LOVE WHITE MEN AND LOVE TO PLAY GAMES” Surely, she means “Scrabble” or “Monopoly”. Otherwise, this is a first. “I hate judgemental people!” There have to be self-esteem issues here. “Just throwing out casts…” And what did your orthopedic surgeon have to say about that? “This is where I’m suppose to make myself sound interesting so bare with me.” So far, so good. “I spend a lot of time sending polite emails, turning people down. Most of them appreciate that I did that.” On second thought, never mind. LOL “Are you looking for a fun loving, beautiful woman with her act together? Well, good luck!” What made this funny was that it was the very last two lines of her profile. “Strong indepented woman not afraid to admit she needs some one to LOVE her.” That pent-up independence is demented stuff, isn’t it? “About him? He will hear my call a mile away. He will whistle my favorite song. He can ride a pony backwards. He can flip pancakes in the air. He’ll be marvelously kind. His favorite shape will be a star. And he’ll have one green eye and one blue.” You know, it seems that all the guys with one green eye and one blue eye whose favorite shape is a star and who can ride ponies backwards are always either married or gay, doesn’t it? Ironically, I do actually know a guy with one green eye and one blue eye. But last I checked, he didn’t have riding ponies backwards down yet. Besides, he’s married (of course). Want to hear more? Scot McKay is the founder of X & Y Communications, a one-stop-shop for dating and relationship resources. He is the author of the books “Deserve What You Want” and “Cook For Your Date”, and hosts the popular podcast series “X & Y On The Fly” with his fiancee Emily Grillo. He may be reached at scot *at* xandycommunications.net or on the Web at www.dating-advice.us and www.romantic-dinner.com. Stop by for a FREE GIFT and to subscribe to the podcast series. Article Source: http://EzineArticles.com/?expert=Scot_McKay http://EzineArticles.com/?Hilarious-Lines-From-Online-Dating-Profiles&id=341390 phentermine online without rx phentermine to buy buy phentermine com get phentermine without a prescription